How to be a good German….

These days I was just surfing in the internet, enjoying some free time when I suddenly come across an article with the following headline: ‘How to handle a German?’ Is it so difficult to handle Germans? Perhaps I have done all these years something awfully wrong? Let’s see, I thought and began to read:


The introduction was so scurrile that I started to feel awkward: ‘Do not try to tell any jokes! Germans like jokes but have a very special sense of humor.’ Oh, is this true? I remember a lot of evenings full of laughter together with German friends or Benjamin Franklin Program friends. I have done something wrong. Ohoh! Perhaps I have to learn how to be a better German, so let us go on:


‘Do not expect every German running around in Lederhosen or big hat chewing a Bratwurst.’ I felt relieved! I looked down; I am wearing none of these! So I am a real German?! I began to relax again. My eyes skimmed over the article and suddenly stopped. Alarm! IHHHHIHHHHIHHHH….’Do not smile too much because Germans are distrustful and do not like this open showing of feelings!’ Oh, of course I like cashiers looking mean like they would like to scratch you dangerously in the next moment….ahhh….actually not! ‘If you are smiling too much Germans think you are not normal.’ Actually I think persons looking like they would be on a funeral are not normal.


‘If you are eating do not put your knife or fork out of hand!’ That was enough; I am German enough to shut down the computer with a loud bang…!